Wednesday, April 18, 2007
We Are The Sex Media: Twilight Sex
filed under: We Are The Sex Media by Lux Nightmare
I’ve noticed, as I’ve gotten older, that sex has gotten better for me: I’m more comfortable with myself, more aware of how my body works, better able to communicate with my partners. And I fully expect that this trend will continue for some time: as I get older, as I approach my “sexual peak” and start experiencing increased desire and (well, hopefully) even better sex.
But what happens after that? We so rarely talk about sex in the later years of life, acting as though we suddenly forget about our genitals once we pass the age of fifty (a thought that, quite frankly, terrifies me). Does aging really necessitate slipping into a sexless state? Does the libido have to die as we get up in years?
Thankfully, no (at least if you believe Jane Brody’s New York Times piece on sex and aging). As Brody puts it,
In fact, it is rarely age per se that accounts for declines in libido among those in the second half-century of life. Rather, it can be any of a dozen or more factors more common in older people that account for the changes. Many of these factors are subject to modification that can restore, if not the sexual energy of youth, at least the desire to seek and the ability to enjoy sex.
And what are these factors? Pretty much the same things that have an effect on libido throughout one’s entire life span: staying fit, keeping your sex life fresh and exciting, and making sure your hormone levels are in good shape.
While some of Brody’s assumptions could be debated (hormone therapy, which she cautiously suggests for older women, is a somewhat controversial practice), it’s refreshing to hear someone come out and say that, yes, sex can be a part of our lives even after we’ve slipped off the “young and hip” radar.
In other words: I’m looking forward to a lifetime of good sex, even after I’ve become too senile to snark on web 2.0 (or even remember what Twitter is). Sexuality is a part of all of us — not just the young and hot — and for that we should all be grateful.
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[…] We Are The Sex Media: Twilight Sex I ve noticed, as I ve gotten older, that sex has gotten better for me: I m more comfortable with myself, more aware of how my body works, … , keeping your sex life fresh and exciting, and making sure your hormone levels are in good shape. While some of Brody s assumptions could be debated (hormone therapy, which she cautiously suggests Posted in Sexerati: Smart Sex. ( 379 links from 143 sites) by mgira […]
How wonderful to discover your site and read this post! I’ve been on a mission to get us talking out loud about older-age sex, and I thank you for helping.
You wrote, “Does aging really necessitate slipping into a sexless state? Does the libido have to die as we get up in years?”
No, absolutely not! We have physiological challenges, but for every challenge, there’s a variety of solutions to explore, as I describe in my book, Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty (Seal Press, 2006, http://www.joanprice.com/BetterThanExpected.htm), and continue to discuss on my blog about sex and aging, http://www.betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com.
I wrote Better Than I Ever Expected to celebrate the joys and address the challenges of older-age sexuality. Since my book came out 1.5 years ago, I’ve found myself catapulted into the role of “senior sexpert” (one newspaper called me a “wrinkly sex kitten,” which I love!) after being interviewed by online and print media from the New York Times (twice) to a variety of national, regional and online magazines and newspapers in US and Canada. I also appeared on ABC Nightline talking about senior sexulaity.
The reporters all act as though spicy senior sex is odd and new. Surely it’s neither, though perhaps we’re talking out loud about it — and being listened to — for the first time.
I hope you’ll visit my blog and comment. You’ll be reassured that you don’t have to say “bye-bye” to sexual vigor and pleasure.
Thanks for opening this subject on your blog!
Joan Price
Join us — we’re talking about ageless sexuality at http://www.betterthanieverexpected.blogspot.com